Young Rogue

kya zamaana aa gaya hai..

hey sab cynics zara idhar ao.ab batao masla kya hai? 'duniya pehle jaisi nahi rahi', 'kya zamaana aa gaya hai', 'kisi pe bharosa nahi raha' waghaira waghaira..oye hello, kitne saal se zinda ho? ohi zamaana hai ji..tusee bas abhi jage ho.

kasam se bheja khaate hain sab ke sab.baatein aisi karte hain jaise sadiyooon se jeete aa rahein hain.ek baat bolun..woh to bolun hi gi..akhir apna blog hai! acha, haan to baat yeh hai ke jitne log tez hain na, uss se kaheeeen ziyada budhu..sorry masoom..hain.in namoonon..sorry masoomon..ko bhi kabhi tak liya karo.lekin naaii..bura dekhen ge acha nahin, andhera dekhen ge roshni nahi, toofan dekhen ge sooraj nahi..waghaira waghaira waghaira.

aur kuch bhi kehna tha mere ko par phir kabhi.abhi ke liye kaafi bakwaas hai.

Death by Chocolate

after a 10 day interval the net at ths place seems to be working..go figure!

concert ws of call, ep and jal.i wsn't expecting much frm call but they weren't half bad.junaid has a strong voice and they did some aala covers.i change the channel wenevr call's on but wen i got bck they were showing a live session of them on IM and i tried listening but i swear something happens to them on TV..ek dum mare huay lagte hain.i dunno wht to make of them.

its the 4th ep concert i've been to so nothing special.its jst tht ths time the crowd ws a bit..well dead, so there wsn't as much headbanging and rocking as im used to..not evn close.there ws a kid who played air guitar thru and thru but nothing else.sad actually.

jal ws last..im sorry but i hate them.we left wen the first song started..pet pooja being tht much more important and rightly so *grin*

mm..my mother has apparently decided tht i can go abroad for studies now.the scholarship thing still applies lekin kya yaar..itna..itna khuppa ke.i dun understand the logic.she's positively eager to get rid of me now (wonder how long it lasts).but..aaaaarrrrggh!!! its not that simple ab!! log bhi na..

aur yar jo net ka masla hai..understand wen my commenting dies.abhi to kam chance hai aisa hone ka lekin koi bharosa nahin..

Ik ehsaas hai, Keh socha na tha
Waqt dhalta raha, Mein chalta raha
Andheron mein bhi, Ik roshnee thee
Us roshnee mein, Ghar jalta raha

Tau dil mera roye to kia
Waqt iradon ko torey to kia
Manzil ko apni payen gai hum
Waqt ko apna banayen gai hum
Jo chahoon woh ho
~Waqt By EP

Warcraft and CS..the bane of the labs

I wish Ani ws somewhere abt right now..so I could kill him. 

And I wish all these guys would stop cursing and hooting over CS..in my current mood its making me want to kill them too!!

And I'm not jealous..not not not not not..

Good morning is an oxymoron..

my borrowed movies come from 2 sources:a.Bajo b.Arq

now Bajo basically buys jst 2..no 3 types.the first type are hindi movies which so always hv to be the most boringest ones (examples: veer zaara and devdas), the second are obscure, gruesome horror movies that I hv no idea why she buys but tht i certainly hv nevr evn heard of..and the third category are chick-flicks.so her latest three buys were all sorta chick flicks and i ended up with meet the fockers, ice princess and miss congeniality 2 (i wonder wht she has against plain old action movies).since im living at a place where the cable either goes out or goes all grainy and dark (i watched naina yesterday..it's a 'dark' movie so basically wht i saw ws a black screen..), where there is no net (and 7.2kbps some days does not count..i'd love to see u open 2 sites with that.some days it's even *horror of horrors* 2.4..beat that!) and where the only books are kiddie tales (i can't believe i finished the first harry potter book yesterday..i avoided tht damned book for 5 goddamn yrs..the things we do when we're desperate..its sad)..nehow the point is tht i watched meet the fockers yesterday and man does it suck!!

ice princess, miss congeniality and be cool left to go. but i did get a novel frm BM and it shud be better..its doesn't look bad (always judge a book by its cover *grin*).oh did i tell u i hv a new sister now? i swear she behaves jst like kukker..and for crying out loud she likes to annoy me! hellooo..im the one who does all the annoying around the house..jeez man.i did meet kukker yesterday too..and Bajo's cat has new whiners a.k.a kittens.

i think i shud go..akshay's jst started to annoy me and i need to work on bistofying him..not to mention that i've been here for one and a half hour and i still hv to show up for work!!

'Cause nothin' lasts forever
And we both know hearts can change
And it's hard to hold a candle
In the cold November rain

We've been through this such a long long time
Just tryin' to kill the pain

But lovers always come and lovers always go
An no one's really sure who's lettin' go today
Walking away
~November Rain by Guns n' Roses

~From Dreams to Dust..and back again~

I'm going to do wht I do best when I hv nothing to say..put up an old poem.Wrote this about a year ago.

That's the way love goes

You'll never know much I care
or how much I wanted you to stay
I know I was cold
but only because I wanted to make it easier for you to leave
You would never have understood if I had told you that I loved you
And in the very next sentence asked you to leave
You would never have understood why even though we loved we could never be
Its not fair I know, but that's the way it is
And it is always easier to let go of someone you think does not care
So I pretended to be immune to your love, acted indifferent for your sake
But it hurt to see you drift away
I know I'll miss you everyday
And now you'll never know how much I love you
or how badly I wish I didn't because of the pain

Chahe koi mujhe jangli kahe!

why do guys hv to pangofy in evrything?and why are girls so duffer-ish?okay maybe they rn't exactly dodos..maybe they jst like stirring up things :|

whtevr..me thinks the whole world's crazy.

so i got another tag from brokenshard!! here goes..

1. 
   

   Total volume of music files on my computer?
   2 GB.

   
   
2. The last CD I bought was:
   Just ths CD of Led Zeppelin songs tht the dude at the store put together for me.
   
   
3. Song playing right now:
   No song..sachee main.Waise last song i heard ws na re na by Ali Azmat for the first time on TV..not a bad video *shrugs*
   
   
4. Five songs I listen to a lot or that mean a lot to me (in no particular order):
   Gaah!! I can never answer qs like these!! I mean itne hote hain and then they change and all.Acha like abhi..mm..
   
   Paradise by the Dashboard Light by Meatloaf
   Everything Louder than Everything Else by Meatloaf
   I would do anything for Love by Meatloaf (I know I know..a lot of meatloaf songs but Im just writing for today na..lol)
   Patience by Guns n' Roses
   Faithfully by Journey

    5. Which 5 people are you passing this baton to, and why? 
    & nbsp;   Natasha for being adorable, Sadaf for making me laugh, Anjul for his 
    & nbsp;   ni ce 'crap', Ozair for having the patience to keep coming back here 
    & nbsp;   and Surinder for always being there.Aah i'm good at this stuff..lol!

    & nbsp;  

Thank God for Sanity!!

Love.
Is complex yes? Yessss preciousssssss.
As a rule, I haven't thought so much about it in life. I think it's overrated, hyped, blown up out of all proportion. Duty is important. Reponsibility is important. What was it the Shienarans said? Death is lighter than a feather, duty heavier than a mountain. Damn straight.

Lately though, that word has been cropping up quite a bit. Hmmm..

I love my mother. And my dad and my brothers. I don't really give a shit about the rest of my family. So ok, that's 4 people I love in the world. That is seriously it. I don't love anyone else.

I ask myself, why. Why is it, that after 25 years on earth, I only love 4 people? Am I a particularly uncaring heartless person? I don't think so.

Love, takes time. Let me repeat that. It takes time. And I don't mean a quarter at LUMS. Or even a year or two. But then LUMS is something of an exception, which I shall deal with in a minute. But first....

Love takes time to develop. That is why I only love 4 people. Because I have really really gotten to know these 4 people. I have seen them at their worst and their best.
Hazrat Umer once asked a man, "Do you know this man?"
"Yes."
"Have you lived under the same roof as this man?"
"No."
"Have you been on a long journey with this man?"
"No."
"Have you had business dealings with this man?"
"No," said the man.
"Then you do not know this man," said the Caliph. (That man rocked!)


Coming back to LUMS.
Ze probelame, my gents and ladies, is that we have to much freedom in university. We are cocooned here. The pressures that go with the realities of life are absent. There are no business dealing here. There are no relatives to mess with your relationships. There are no real lasting politics (I shall ignore the birthday politics that have sprung over the past year out of everyone's desire to please everyone and to be the bestest of friends with everyone. I shall even ignore the back-stabbing politics of the dean's listers) There are no money issues. We get out comfy little allowance from home. It's like a little vacation, all paid for by our parents.

This freedom, coupled with the lack of responsibilities and a sufficient influx of funds from mommy and daddy creates a very lethal environment. Everyone is free to portray any image they like to their peers. People are seldom what they seem in real life. There are wheels within wheels, complexities within complexities. The non-real environment of LUMS screws with these givens even more. We are not who we seem to be. We do not even wear 'the mask.' We create masks - lots of them - one for each circle of friends. We pretend to be what we would like to be, not who we are.

In times of stress however, we return to who we really are. I am sure you can imagine what then happens to our relationships with each cirlce of 'friends'.
Not a good place to decide you are 'in love' wouldn't you say?

Hmm..methinks I ramble; then again, that's why I created this thing :D

Love takes a long time. I don't expect to say to my wife: "I love you" even after a couple of years. My brothers used to make fun of me.

"Woh bolay gee, I love you. Tu bolay ga, haan sahee hai. Soch raha hun."

Soch raha hun.....

that post ws tree elf's.he's an awesome blogger.seriously baba..see his blog.

abt the post..mm..nothing.

printing woes

my printer jammed..so i took it apart.i don't think it's jammed anymore..i think it's dead..sshhh.

why do i feel the need to take a screw-driver to evrything? granted it works most times but wht do i know abt printers neways..except tht they're giant, uncooperative, unpredictable monsters!!

so now i can't print my help-sheet..do u think everyone will understand if i kick it hard...jst once??

*stares at the printer maliciously*

no u sound romantic for once..

Love confessions
Messed-up thoughts
Raging emotions
Sealed and locked

A touch that lingers
Words that stay
Seeming near
But far away

Silent tears
Bleeding heart
A rebel instinct
Supressed and crushed

Days and months
Years that pass
End of story
Infinite love

Mangoes!!

'u'll end up like me...'

not really..no.i'll jst end up like me a couple of yrs ago.swell.

words

Never

You swore you would always love me
Need me till the end of time
When the sands dried up on the beaches
And the stars fell from the sky

A glance full of meaning that i didn't get
A taste of all that's unwise
A shimmering, dreamlike evening
Looks that were meant to beguile

All the moves, all the words, all the while..
Was there ever a moment of truth in your lies?

Stardust*

i hv to mail 4 ppl.not 1, not 2..but 4..including one i shud've mailed 2 weeks ago.yiiikkes!!

one of my group partners is putting the project assignment together right now.atleast she's doing something this time.i totally iggied her requests fer assistance..im turning meeann.lol.comeon..ppl shud get wht work is all abt..and i did my part.all she had to do ws arrange it..5 minute job..uss main bhi help *shakes her head sadly* on second thought maybe i shud go check on her..for someone who doesn't evn know how to mail *gulp* maybe leaving her alone to print it out isn't such a good idea afterall..

first mom tells me to call up kukker..then aks.kya yaar.it's not like we've nevr been separated b4.sab log kam tension lo.

'Listen, real poetry doesn't say anything; it just ticks off the possibilities. Open all doors.You can walk through anyone that suits you.'  ~Jim Morrison justifying his abstract lyrics that continue to grab the imagination of rock listeners.

Psychobabble Rap

Stop bshittin' me man
Don't act like that
I can see right thru u
So dun put up a mask

U want a change
I cin live wid tht
But wen u start wid the crap
I'm leavin' here man

Who u gonna fool boy?
(Noone gives damn)
Who u gonna fool boy?
(u or the cat?)

Remember Tom James..
How he jumped the bridge?
He tried to be hip
But ended up in a ditch
Late one night his mask jst slipped
When he saw wht he'd become,
depression kicked in
From then on he jst sank deep
And i mean that..literally

Who u gonna fool boy?
(Noone cares)
Who gonna fool boy?
(It's all a sham)
Who u gonna fool now?

'I don't care it's all psychobabble rap to me..' -Best of Alan Parson's Project

For someone who pull punches that easily..

Friday the 13th

i didn't wake up wid the alarm so i've jst failed my test.finals from friday.i dun think i'll take the summer quarter.i wnt to but i won't..things are getting too insane and i feel too damn much.

how the hell do u keep ppl out neways? i tried to but it doesn't work.not many ppl can get close to me but it's the one's tht can tht are the problem.ppl hate so easily, so many grudges ovr so many small things..why can't i be tht way? life wud be so much simpler.

i ws thinking how dumb ppl are.u know wen they can't understand me.but its the ppl who do who're scary.they're very very few but they're way too good and they totally freak me out.

maybe i'll go to khi after exams.i think there are some summer work hrs u hv to complete as well so maybe after all that.maybe i'll join a community service..more than one..tire myself out.then again maybe i shud jst stay around and see if my mom'll need me.somehow i dun think she will..she's strong.

ah..maybe i shud study.i shudn't jst accept tht my GPA is going be below nething decent ths time..or shud i?

tht's why i shudn't blog.i'm thinking too much..feeling too much...and doing very little.

also i guess not hving the net where i live is a pretty good reason too.

U don't say!! *agog*

i know i sed i mite not blog and i'm not..i'm jst copy-pasting!

It happened several years ago in the Paris opera house. A famous singer had been contracted to sing, and ticket sales were booming. In fact, the night of the concert found the house packed and every ticket sold. The feeling of anticipation and excitement was in the air as the house manager took the stage and said, "Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for your enthusiastic support. I am afraid that due to illness, the man whom you've all come to hear will not be performing tonight. However, we have found a suitable substitute we hope will provide you with comparable entertainment." The crowd groaned in disappointment and failed to hear the announcer mention the stand-in's name. The environment turned from excitement to frustration.

The stand-in performer gave the performance everything he had. When he had finished, there was nothing but an uncomfortable silence. No one applauded. Suddenly, from the balcony, a little boy stood up and shouted, 'Daddy, I think you are wonderful!' The crowd broke into thunderous applause.

We all need people in our Lives who are willing to stand up once in a while and say, 'I think you are wonderful.'
confessome's blog

edit: oh and see ths too> story

Unplugged

gaah..i completely forgot abt the concert.i hv to come here and see evryone wid a guitar to remember!! don't think i shud go.things don't look so hot..evn the AEISEC thing sucked *makes a face*

food-street..and the 'patooray' story

we might be leaving home tonite permanently..i didn't know last nite it wud be so sudden but if my sister can move during her O-level finals i think i'll manage my quarter finals somehow too.

so..might not log in for some 3 months or so.perhaps becoz i can't, perhaps becoz i don't wnt to.i hvn't decided abt blogging yet.things look so uncertain and i wnt to stop blogging frm my university.i suppose i'll know in time.

i dun wnt to be more specific..right now just three friends i can somewht talk to..one's studying, the other's trekking in some sher-less (fake!) jungle and the third one will go all gentle on me.bah!

hv ta leave now..i've gotten myself into another mess at the university..my potential for doing stupid things is apparently limitless.

kya samjha?

wrote ths a month ago..ths is the farthest my writings can get frm verse.

a lot of ppl speak of time and healing.but do they know?wht if sorrow is precious?after all evrything must balance..a tear for a smile..a loss for a gain.nothing lasts forevr.nothing is free.wht goes around comes around..and all tht jazz.
if u do not miss something how do u kno u evr had it?how wud u learn to hold on and nevr let go the next time something as precious comes around?how wud u recognize joy if u nevr knew pain?
they ask me of love..wht of it?i ws rite.it's not worth it.tht strength u carry so proudly..the indifferent glance..the untouchable soul..all of it disintegrates in a flash of knowledge.can u take tht?if u had to choose and not jst fall, wud u wnt to?am i glad i did?i do not know.i do not know nething.maybe wht i took as love ws jst mistaken affection.maybe i ws jst in love wid the idea of love.maybe ths world is jst a mirror of our dreams and nightmares.
i do not know.

goli maar bejhe main, bejha shor karta hai..

i wuz finally able to calculate my GPA..its 3.56.faryl topped comm..kukker ws quite mean abt it.she wnts her to stop giving othr students headaches.

TR went a lil' crazy today but u hvta admire his thinking.less than 0.00066%..brr..itna nahin sochna chahiye..bhejha fry ho gaya to?

Living in an Insane World

I wnt to KILL them. i feel like crying!! they are such jerks and he's now officially ugly..gaah! i dun care..wen ppl are ugly i WILL call them ugly. not that i mind ugly..but arggh!! who the hell moves up the schedule? why? WHY WHY WHY? im sleepy..i dun wnt to give a presentation wid jerks i can barely stand now. jerks who only care abt their precious lives..and can't evn be bothered to say sorry for getting me a zero and messing up my academic life and my GPA and my SLEEP. grrr..

i sound like such a kid!! i wnt hard metal..i dun wnt to stay here in ths sorry lab waiting fer the precious sods to finish their precious work.im HUNGRY! waaah!!

*calm calm* u kno nice ppl too..ppl like sm who let u copy again today.lol.yeah we all cheat in prob..so sue me =P